Saturday, 6 July 2013

TEST Gains All Sov Thanks to Typo

After a typo from CCP on Thursday caused a battle in Z9PP-H to be cut drastically short, another blunder from our overlords granted Test Alliance Please Ignore sovereignty over all 3294 nullsec systems. The Eve community is still reacting to the shock caused by this event, and to add to the effect CCP have indicated they won't interfere with events and therefore will not return sovereignty to anyone.

It's not quite clear what enabled this to happen, the official statement barely seems plausible. CCP Falcon explained what happened in a stickied thread in the General Discussion subforum. According to his recount, a system in CCP's private constellation was having its sovereignty changed from Jove to CCP as part of a test of sovereignty bills. However, the employee who was doing the transfer was drunk at the time, which caused his finger to slip several times until Test Alliance was auto filled in as being on the receiving end of the move, and all the nullsec systems in Eve were selected as being transferred. This changed the ownership of every active Territorial Claim Unit in the game to Test. Even more controversially CCP will not give the taken sovereignty back to its former owners.

This news has been greeted to a mostly negative reception. Of course there were some winners in this, including Test, Tribal Band (Whom Test have now restored sov to) and riverini. They filled the forum thread that was otherwise full of hatred with their congratulations, gfs and light trolling. BoodaBooda, leader of Test, has said that although his conquest over all of nullsec was completely unfair, it's happened so everyone should HTFU. Fellow Test members have echoed this message, causing many a tear and over 700 pages of comments.

Test are keen to see that their advantage remains for as long as possible, and have allowed many exiled corporations to join them. They include elements from all kinds of background, ranging from Spacemonkey's Alliance to Brothers of Tangra. It's estimated that after the joining period for alliances has elapsed, Test will contain over 30,000 members. BoodaBooda and his directorate have announced the OCCCDHMNPPSTTTTVEC (Organisation of Cadmium, Caesium, Chromium, Cobalt, Dysprosium, Hafnium, Mercury, Neodymium, Platinum, Promethium, Scandium, Technetium, Thulium, Titanium, Tungsten and Vanadium Exporting Corporations) will be fixing T2 prices, which has caused the price of a Buzzard to rise to 500mil isk in speculation. With no logistics and no motivation to refuel POSes, Test is expected to own every moon with moon materials within the next month.

The alliances on the losing side of this vicissitude have already drawn up plans of what to do next. Although they could try to fight Test together, most of them say they'd rather do something else due to the agony involved in grinding over 3000 TCUs and I-Hubs. The CFC, and in particular Goonswarm Federation, have said they will burn Jita until every CFC affiliated alliance ceases to exist. After this announcement was made Jita reached its population cap 9 minutes after downtime ended. Many systems along the Jita-Amarr trade lane have been population capped themselves and thousands of Freighters have descended upon 4-4 to evacuate every asset they have.

N3 will be transitioning into wormhole space, and have laid claim to every Class 6 wormhole. At the present moment they have managed to trap around 12 capitals in Class 5 wormholes that appeared in lowsec, and are said to be confused as to the reason why they collapse after three capitals pass through them.

Pandemic Legion has joined Factional Warfare on the Amarr/Caldari side, and have already pushed both of the factions to T4 control. They have come up with an original idea to thrawt the menace of warp core stabilised site running frigates. Their method involves bridging heavy interdictors to a cloaky cyno ship, then jumping in at least 10 capitals for good measure. Shadoo said that while this is not a very efficient tactic, it is a comical one. "Sometimes we leave the target for a few minutes to bridge in every supercapital we have online, there's nothing funnier than watching 50 titans bumping a Condor. I don't know why we even fought the CFC in the first place, it was nowhere near as hillarious as this."

Members of the Providence block, composed mainly of CVA, Severance and the Yulai Federation, have adapted to this sudden change by playing World of Warcraft. A spokesperson for the new joint guild founded on a PVE server said that "wow is so much more friendly than eve!!! lol! )))))"

Despite the initial shock, Eve seems to be adapting to the change quite well. Despite the hundreds of trillions of isk that has been lost to factors such as baby supercapitals and the contents of POSes, all major organisations have found something else to do and are quite content with doing it.


  1. This is actually amazing. Well done!

  2. Excellent read!

  3. Hilarious :D

  4. TEST and Goon will fall, every empire does.

    1. They're tethered to existance by reddit and SA, until they collapse neither will Test or Goonswarm.

    2. Its possible for them to lose their space though.
      While they might not cease existing, they, like BOB before them, will lose their sov (most likely to internal issues given their massive size)

  5. We're not playing WoW, we're all hanging out in Vendetta Online.

  6. Oh man, this is great. Nice work!

  7. Comedy gold. Ihad to giggle insanely several times.