Friday, 14 March 2014

The CFC Declares War on Guristas and Serpentis

Following his coalition's successful wars against N3 and BL, space emperor The Mittani announced his coalition would be deploying to their home regions to fight a counter-offensive against their greatest enemy yet: the belt rats and NPCs of the north and west.

This could be the greatest challenge yet faced by the coalition since their formation in 2010. The #1 killer of Goonswarm Federation ships in 2013 and other alliances in the CFC have suffered similar results - media magnate Xander Phoena lost three Ishtars to hit squads of Guristas in anomalies in the month of February alone.

Many have questioned whether the CFC have the ability to win this war. After a successful campaign of mostly-AFK combat in the south, they are hoping to repeat their tactics by using the mighty AFKtar with a newbie doctrine of Vexor Navy Issues and Dominixes with support wings of Noctises, Mobile Tractor Units and Encounter Surveillance Systems.Many speculators have been quick to comment on the controversial inclusion of the ESS - many believe it will harm the CFCs campaign rather than aid it due to the threat of third-party interceptors siding with the NPCs.

It's more than likely we'll also see ratting carriers deployed, with a higher concentration in Delkein. Ratting carriers are one of the Guristas' greatest weaknesses - and they know it. It's likely they'll hire locals including Mordus Angels and Triumvirate. to use their capitals against the carriers. Without their help they'll be powerless against the 10,000 DPS tanked carriers hoovering up Sanctums by the hour.

Enemies of Goonswarm have sneered at the fact that they can be easily defeated by people who can't change their damage type and have easily predictable and well-known fleet compositions and positions. Gevlon Goblin was among these people, and was quick to publicise his hope that this war would allow him to take one or two highsec POCOs. Others are calling this a sneaky rouse by CFC leadership so they have an excuse to not save the Russian block from their inevitable demise at the hands of Hero and N3.

It's unclear how long CFC morale will hold up in this war - losses to NPCs are not eligible for SRP and taking on an organisation that's generally accepted to be immortal with a limitless supply of ships can be intimidating. At any rate it's clear that people who whined about the blue doughnut after B-R5RB are idiots and are not to be trusted.

Sunday, 2 March 2014

Baki Yuku Steals Black Legion Dread Cache After Being in the Alliance for One Day

Renowned cunt and artisan bullshitter Baki Yuku again found himself a source of controversy today, after it emerged he had stolen 57 dreadnoughts and 14 carriers after being in Hover Inc. for just 28 hours. CEO Wirk Hoover was unable to explain 'who let the shitlord in' or how he was given any form of corporate roles.

Some people would point out it's disturbing that Baki Yuku was let into any corp following his period of failure in Test and Insidious Empire. His corp was admitted into Hand of Despair, Darkness of Despair's renter alliance, as part of a plan by Russian and CFC leaders to 'stop him from accidentally causing a fail cascade in one of their alliances. A Goonswarm Federation diplomat explained the situation.
"It was imperative that we kept Baki a safe distance from us, which we achieved by giving his corp a place in HD in return for him not joining any of our alliances on alts. We were worried that even if we said we'd never give him roles, he'd coax some lower level director into giving him roles by firing a volley of bullshit, like 'hey I need starbase config. roles to set up a POS for my 20 titans.' Unfortunately, he escaped on Saturday. We've got no idea were his alts are now, he could transform any of our alliances to shit with the Baki touch at any moment."
The move took most Black Legion members by surprise. Although they saw his application thread on the forums which was subsequently accepted, most thought it was a highly amusing joke. There was 'outrage and disgust' when he actually joined, with many suiciding frigates into the CFC in protest. Baki delivered a short speech to his alliance, in which he stated he planned to use his 'growing number of titans' against the CFC, despite numerous threats that his titans would be awoxed.

With Black Legion on the verge of dying after suffering Baki Yuku, many are asking whether he could be tamed and used against potential enemies. He has now killed three of the four alliances he has been in, a rate greater than any spy has ever achieved. It seems few people are unwilling to approach Baki in case their capital caches disappear or their titans get aborted.

Baki Yuku kindly agreed to speak with me regarding these claims.
"Look I did it for a good reason. I recently bought 86 dreadnought pilots to compliment my 19 titans and 33 supercaps, but I didn't have the dreadnoughts to fly them. I had to borrow some BL dreads because I lost the Test cache, I don't know where it went. I promise I won't do the same thing to the next alliance that accepts me."
People are debating whether Hoover Inc. will be Baki Yuku's last corp. With all alliances in the CFC, Rus and N3 now blacklisting him he may have no choice but to use an alt to steal more capitals. We could see a rare display of coordination across nullsec as all major coalitions attempt to thwart the cache-stealing menace that is Baki Yuku.