Sunday 17 April 2016

Who Are the Ten Most Influential People in Eve?

This article was sponsored by (free Goon killmail with every bet) 

The Eve Onion offices have been a whirlwind of activity. Editor Tubrug1 gave us poor staffers the job of finding out who were the ten most influential people in Eve Online. He then flew off in his new gold titan with SUAS – no idea where he got that from.

1. Eep (owner of IWantIsk) - I’ve got a note here from Tubrug saying that Eep needs to be #1 on this list.
2. Niden – this Eve media genius revived the once dead corpse of the niche Scottish language site Crossing Zebras; transforming it into the 2nd best Eve news site on the Internet.
3. Grath Telkin – you may know Grath from such failed Kickstarter adverts as ‘The Fountain War’. Media celebrity and secret leader of Pandemic Legion Grath is best known for running Eve’s largest charity Ship Replacement Fund – if you’ve lost a ship send him your lost mail now!
4. Laz – Eve’s premier twitch streamer who has attracted a loyal following of beard fetishsts; he’s also got a cool racing chair. Laz is annoyingly nice so I can’t bring myself to take the piss out of him. 
5. Progodlegend – if you’ve just thought up a cool fit for a ship this guy probably invented it first. Former part-time CSM and above average TEST fleet commander(sic) ProGod rocks in at the number five spot
6. Villy – famed former Goon FC and now chief nerd herder for TEST alliance, Villy is currently burning the North and claiming he invented boredom in Eve. A bold claim for a bold man.
7. The Mittani – the leader of the Band of Businessmen, he is the Rupert Murdoch of Eve: creepy, rich and powerful but nobody's sure why.
8. Sion Kumitomo – the James Murdoch of Eve; nuff said really
9. Jeff Raider – Eve’s top meth fuelled podcaster. Jeff has Eve’s most interesting guests on this show which is handy because on his own he’s a boring tool.
10. Xander Phoena – pastebin addict and one-time foreign language podcaster; if you have a secret for fuck's sake don’t tell him.

 Agree with our list? If not let us know in the comments.

No comments:

Post a Comment