Monday, 11 November 2013

Mad Ani Promises to Stamp Out Protests With an Iron First

Mad Ani delivered a defiant speech in a post in General Discussion today, announcing he would not tolerate protests against his bid to become a CCP employee. He also attempted to buy an advertisement encouraging people to subscribe to his stream in this opening paragraph, but has failed to do so.

It is believed he took this action after it emerged some people in the official forum thread did not like him and were not prepared to give him real money. Sources close to Mad Ani say he was 'outraged' and 'disgusted' by the sudden realisation. This prompted him to write a brief post about what would happen to the people who dared to violate his rules.

"Mad Ani 24/7 Live Stream
Hello. I'm a neutral Eve news correspondent who streams fights. It emerged earlier today that there are some people who disagree with my stream. Let me make this perfectly clear:
You cannot disagree with my stream. 
If I receive intelligence that you have said something negative about my stream, you will be blocked. This means you will not be able to use the twitch chat on my stream or talk to me ingame. I only want to have to repeat this once: you will not be able to use the twitch chat on my stream or talk to me ingame.
You have one chance.
Please subscribe to my stream for only $4.99! This money helps to keep the stream running and allows me to be unemployed!"

Within minutes the forum thread was full of people well-wishing Mad Ani. The first two pages contained completely positive comments, including 'every1 except u is a faggot mad ani!' and 'you are the most friendly player in Eve! CCP Mad Ani!'.

Unfortunately the peace did not last long. As soon as word got out, hundreds of non-fanboys descended on the thread, causing scenes of devestation. Goons, carebears, griefers, carebears, miners and renters united in their hatred of Mad Ani. After replying 'blocked' to every negative commenter for the first few minutes, he suddenly fell silent. Reports indicate he retreated to the webcam on his live stream, where he remained in an irate mood for several hours.

After disabling the stream's chat, he could be seen talking to himself while naked, and began stroking a fedora with sunglasses on. Eventually he dispensed with the Eve stream altogether, instead displaying his webcam fullscreen. This has left at least seven people dead, with up to fourteen more severely injured. Many remain confused and worried.


  1. I LOLed.

    I'm not going to promote myself, but if the likes of Tyen, Biohazard and myself are the Discovery Channel of Eve Online Streaming - trying to create interesting and engaging content - Mad Ani is the MTV2 +1 of Twitch broadcasters