Sunday, 24 January 2016

/r/eve Reader Contracts AIDS, Hepatitis C and Ebola From Badpost

The Eve subreddit has been placed under quarantine after an innocent bystander was hospitalised due to coming into contact with what bystanders described as a 'truly horrific post'.

It's believed notorious /r/eve denizen Derty Dan was responsible for the offending literature. Fortunately Gorksi Car happened to stumble upon the thread while on active mod duty and was able to remove the dangerous comment before it could do any more damage. Gorski suffered only minor injuries, caused by his head dropping onto his desk.

Sion Kumitomo was quick to again point out the danger /r/eve posed to the health of the game.. Speaking to the Eve Onion, he said "High calibre authors will look at this and think 'wow these faggots can't post for shit'. No one will want to deal with 'that shitposting community.' This will deprive Eve of new players and it will die."

Derty, who came close to scooping /r/eve 2015 poster of the year award, was reported to be distraught after he heard the news. It's rumoured he has gone into a self-imposed exile in which he plans travel around the world to meet the finest posters bestowed upon the human race. Doctors caring for the anonymous victim have tried to reverse the damage by exposing him to /r/evedreddit. However, this has only made his condition worse.

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